As discussed previously, two of the longer-serving heads of government in Europe either have left office or will leave imminently. But Ireland is here to save us from this swirl of chaos. Last week the Irish electorate voted to reelect Bertie Ahern as taoiseach, or prime minister, giving his Fianna Fail party 78 seats, the largest plurality in the Dail Erin. Clearly, the best part of Irish politics is the names. Ahern has held the top spot for the last ten years, and has earned another five-year stint, thus preserving some order in the region.

Ahern has earned the nickname "the teflon taoiseach" for his ability to escape from scandal (in general, it is a good sign if your head of government shares a nickname with John Gotti). Ahern and Fianna Fail looked dead in the water at the beginning of the campaign due to some questionable deals made when Ahern was the finance minister. It took a stroke of political genius to get around this one: Ahern sat down and carefully and clearly explained what happened. After this Fianna Fail's poll numbers took off, and they retained their position of power. Imagine, a politician appealing to the intelligence of the electorate and being rewarded for it.

In the United States, the House is debating perhaps the most important topic of the session: preventing the construction of a superhighway between Mexico and Canada that would run through the center of the US. Virgil Goode, a Republican representative from Virginia, is sponsoring a bill that would condemn the proposal, which would have two large highways around train tracks. Goode, the reader may recall, was the representative that was so upset that Minneapolis elected Keith Ellison to Congress that he sent a letter to his constituents condemning the election of a Muslim and stating that this proved that the US needs a stronger immigration policy.

The only problem is that there is no proof of any plan to build this highway. Those people who claim that it is in the work do not work in the Department of Transportation, of government at all, from what I can tell. Their theory is that it is the first step in a plan to merge the US with Canada and Mexico into a NAFTA state. They point to the existence of a few organizations, including one with the audacity to claim that expanding some major interstate highways, such as I-94 and I-35 would benefit the shipping industry. In total, Rep. Goode has introduced a resolution based on a conspiracy theory. Bravo, Virginia.

Also, Nick Mancini, the proprietor of the finest steakhouse in the Twin Cities, passed away last week.

The Editorial Board regrets the length of time between editions. On the bright side, readership is now up to four. The best part is that all of you are Jews, which will make it easier to talk about the banking and the diamonds.